Thursday, September 16, 2010

Wild Animus : A Book to Read

I was giving the a book called Wild Animus the other day, because of my love of wolves. I went online to do some research about it and found the following. Please reply with any knowledge or experience that you have from the book.

I have not yet had the opportunity to read the book, but I will say that it has already lost some potential in my books for the simple fact that is read by Peter Coyote. Coyote?! Really!? It couldn't be a wolf related name. As for some more information about the book please keep reading.

"Rich Shapero’s Wild Animus is the story of a young idealist, Ransom Altman, whose quest for fundamentals drives him to the Alaskan wilderness where, alone with his dangerous ideas, he transforms himself into a wild creature prey to a strangely familiar pack of wolves."

The most pertinent book review for Wild Animus is the following:

5.0 out of 5 stars EXCELLENT multi-use tool!, February 27, 2005
This review is from: Wild Animus: A Novel (Paperback)
I, like many others, received this book for free. But unlike others, I found this book a delight to have around the house.

It served quite well as a monitor riser for my LCD screen.

My friend and I needed a book to add weight for a tofu press.

Pages 200 to 225 made wonderful firestarters when covered in paraffin wax.

One night, we took the cover and walked around the downtown Seattle area hiding our faces behind it and saying "Wooo, wolf eyes, scawwy wolf eyes", while three people behind us kept asking people "Have you seen the walruses?" in Scooby-Doo voices.

One night we drank too much and began reading the worst prose we could find in voices like Darth Vader and Mickey Mouse over a microphone to loud techno music. People apparently loved this prose more than Lynne Cheney's book on lesbian sexual relationships.

The cat ate pages 123 to 127 when we ran out of catgrass for him to chew.

The door below sometimes slams shut when coming in and out of the apartment, so rather than going out to buy a doorstop, we use the book!

Every so often you can pick a random phrase out of it that makes you howl with laughter.

Handing it to someone who's taken more than six hits of acid in their lifetime and asking them whether it's accurate in the description is highly amusing - especially when you get their faces to screw up like you've just asked them to kill the baby Jesus with a rusty spork.

It is an excellent candidate for book frisbee on a sunny afternoon in the park.

I take it with me when camping in the case that I run out of toilet paper.

Gosh, I'm sure I could find more excellent uses for this most entertaining book. If paper cuts were something desired, I'm sure you could add that as a bonus, since the cheap paper on the books provides HUNDREDS of those to the reader.

However, you might not want to expose your cortex to the language. It puts me in mind of the Douglas Adams characters, the Vogons, whose poetry is only the third worst in the galaxy. That, in of itself, is a distinction.

Like the movie Showgirls, this book is so jaw-droppingly bad that it's an entertaining read just to see how badly a book COULD be written. It's not just a gigantic cliche, it's a cliched parody of every 1960s novel or poem written by every poet or writer seeking truth within the American experience.

So if nothing else, it's a marvelous book to be used for anything except reading.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

A Man Among Wolves

How did I miss this? Best show ever created.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Wolf Pack for Life: NASCAR Edition

This past weekend I took part in one of America's great time honored traditions. I went to Richmond, Virginia to watch Denny Hamlin win the Richmond 400 NASCAR race. I know many of you are thinking 'NASCAR really?!' Many of you probably think of the following t-shirt when you think of NASCAR. After experiencing the full tailgate and race I will have to respectfully disagree with those who think that NASCAR is boring.

NASCAR is awesome. People are tailgating, playing cornhole, eating BBQ, and talking smack to people who support other drivers. The one thing that you need to know going in is that you have to have a driver. If you just attempt to watch the entire race you will be entirely lost, you also want have a cadre of fans to support you. You will additionally have someone to follow around in ovals the entire race. During most of the race I followed the '17' car. I chose this car for no other reason than the fact that it was my number during high school soccer, and well, it was the Crown Royal car.

The main reason that I have yet to chose the driver that I will support for the rest of my life is because I haven't yet determined which driver has the most wolf t-shirt wears in the last year. As a first timer I also didn't want to stick out from the crowd, so I attempted to dress most like what I perceived a NASCAR fan to be. I like to call it a cross between the Wal-Mart special and Bret from 'Flight of the Conchords'

It was a simple combination of wolf t-shirt (w/moon) self-made jorts, Navy hat and the exact same vest Bret is wearing in this great jump scene. While wearing this superb outfit I found it extremely easy to make friends. As soon as people saw the wolf t-shirt they knew that I was both cool and tough. Reflecting on this fact makes me realize that most people are likely very nervous to talk to someone wearing such attire. This is why most people, instead of approaching me, pointed to their friend and whispered something in their ear. The conversation probably went something like this:

Friend 1: Do you see that guy with a wolf t-shirt?
Friend 2: Yeah, he is the coolest and toughest guy here.
Friend 1: That's what I was going to say, do you think he would like to be the father of my children?
Friend 2: Not to be mean (hot friend), but you can't just walk up to a guy like that.
Friend 1: You're right, we should just take a picture and laugh to ourselves so that he thinks we're funny.
Friend 2: Great idea!

All that considered there was still one person who decided to approach me in my coolest and toughtest moment. While I was exiting the port-a-potty. A random man yelled 'WOLF PACK FOR LIFE' and proceeded to make a wolf hand signal. I echoed the greeting and we have since become pack brothers for life. Thank you wolf t-shirts, thank you for making new friends for me.
-One Man.